Ben’s 38th birthday, 21 Feb 2022
You were born, my Benjamin, on February 21st at 11:38 in the morning in a town just a little north of Chicago. There was a fierce snowstorm outside. My labor was short and hard. At one point you stopped breathing. So did I. When you were finally born, when I saw your face for the first time and held you in my arms, I couldn’t breathe again, this time for joy.
My first son. No words can describe this love.
I loved being your mom. Every single day. I still do. I always will.
This was initially a song I’m trying to write (I Will Try) but it sucks and is far from ready. I recorded the audio instead. Some memories. Are you still making music? When I try to compose, I stumble in the dark, but you, my beautiful son, soar.
Please fly home soon.
Feature image by Ben Archer. This was Ben’s icon on WordPress.